on staying home

It is strange to think that last year on this day, we were settling into our apartment in Amiens.  Or maybe we were en route, or sleeping off the jet lag or cleaning said apartment top-to-bottom in order to make it feel just a little more like home... it's all a blur.  At any rate, we were in the midst of starting another season.  My tenth one with Billy.  Fast forward to today, the first day of training camp begins, without Bill.  It is a sad feeling.   

I'm still feeling so conflicted about it all (even though I've had the entire summer to mull it over. Talk about slow to embrace change) and hope we like our life here as much as we did abroad.  There is a whole lot of evidence suggesting that this new chapter in our lives will be a big success.  But oh France, how I will miss you.  I know everyone is getting really tired of me lamenting (on and on and on...) about France but look at these pictures!  How could I possibly not feel nostalgic?!

How dreamy!  

And I catch myself thinking of all the things I could be doing and experience there.  And all the things I wont ever do again.  And all of the little everyday things I still miss (the sound of church bells and trains passing through the night, cobblestones, walking downtown among fountains and statues, watching Bill play hockey, hearing the crowd chant his name, seeing Jake light-up at the rink, eating fresh pastries, buying 4 euro bottles of wine...).  And let me tell you, this line of thinking is extremely counterproductive.

However...  

despite the many things I am missing about hockey, France and Europe the packing and unpacking is definitely not one of them.  And I'm happy to have my family close by to listen to me lament about it all :) 

All images via this is glamorous .com